This post is intended for new, first-time authors. The reference to “new” is because those whose books have been available for some time already know about this.

You’ve published your book, maybe done a little marketing, and so far you've had a few or even no sales. You receive an email addressed to you personally. The sender appears to be from a recognizable publisher, agent, book club, or another entity or person you believe has learned something about you and your book. They want to help you.

"Dear (your name),

I don't do this very often, but I was so taken by what I've read about you and your book that I couldn't resist reaching out. I am a (agent, publisher, book retailer, social media influencer, etc.). I enjoy helping new, unknown authors succeed. (More of the same follows.)

Warm regards,
(Name, title, and, in some cases, a recognizable company name related to books.) 

You conclude that this could be exactly what you need to make your book a success.

It's not, and the person reaching out isn't who they claim to be. Still, flattery from someone claiming to be an "agent" or "publisher" can feel like recognition for what you’ve done. 

You lower your guard.

“Maybe this person really is who they claim to be.” 

You respond; the other person replies to you via multiple emails. You become more certain that s(he) is legit… and then the pitch arrives: $1,000–$10,000 for "marketing packages," "Hollywood film representation," "hybrid publishing contracts," etc. 

At this point, they have you seriously considering retaining their services.

My first Unlived Lives book has been out for two years, the sequel for a year, and the third in the trilogy for just under a year. I get five to ten emails like this from different people every day.

No matter how impressive the company or person contacting me seems, they all use Gmail addresses. What legitimate company would have its employees use Gmail for company email?

Everything they say about me and my books is reworked from what is publicly available online. No one actually said they bought one or more of the books, let alone read them, only that they were so impressed.

To keep the connection going, many ask a question they assume I would like to answer. Something like “What is the ‘inspiration’ for your writing?” And most telling, the complimentary close is always “Warm regards” or “Warmest regards”.

Watch for these red flags. Don’t respond. 

This isn’t meant to take anything away from your ability as an author or your books. It’s just a warning not to be surprised when you hear from those who, given the chance, will take your marketing money and leave you with very little, if anything, in return.

As you struggle to envision the lives you didn't live—the result of your choices—imagine Eden trying to understand her unlived life, having never been born. 

I know some of my “what ifs” are too far-fetched for some of you to accept; the above is probably one of them. 

You comment, “That’s impossible!” “No way!” “We’re either born, or we’re not!” "What the hell?"

To be honest, I occasionally enjoy rattling the cage, getting those and similar responses in return. But doing so also requires me to answer in a way that won’t offend the person making the comment, hopefully prompting them to think…“But what if that were me?”

It’s okay if you can’t put yourself in the shoes of Raymond, Shelly, Asian, Eden, An, or any of the other Unlived Lives characters. No one book is for everyone.

That said…

What if Asian, who was killed in the war, were to meet and marry Eden, who would have been the daughter of Raymond and Shelly (were they not dead), when they were both twenty-three, a half-century after Asian was killed and before Eden was never born, on a Tuesday?🤔In Kathmandu?🤭

Last week's blog post name-checked Eden and An. If you’ve read Reckoning, you know their story. They spend time together in Barcelona, Singapore, Hoi An, Vietnam, and at Other Worlds Coffee, where their individual choices determine their eternal destinies.

That’s fiction; your life isn’t.

Countless people pass through your life. Your decisions, along with their reactions, placed you both in the lives you live. Your time with them was only the start of one of the lives you would have lived. 

Focus on one person whose life briefly intersected yours until your choices sent you both in different directions. Where are they now? What are they doing? Are they happy?

Are you?

Where would you be now had you made different choices in the past?

Most who think about the lives they would have lived had they made different choices understand what that means.

"It's a good thing I decided not to go to the mall today. There was a robbery, and the robber and police were shooting at each other."

But imagining how different life would be if a person you know were never born is a whole different matter. And I took it one giant step further by making An and Eden a couple in The Unlived Lives Reckoning. 

An is the son of Đoàn An Giáp ("Asian"), who was killed in action having been forced to fight for the Vietcong/NVA. Eden would have been the daughter of Raymond and Shelly, if they hadn't both died before conceiving her. And that's where a significant number of readers draw the line.

Someone living a different life based on their choices, ok. Someone never born because the couple who would have been their parents were killed, also ok. But An, who was born, and Eden, who wasn't born, meeting and becoming a couple on a street in Barcelona, Spain...?

There is so much in life today, both good and bad, that I never would have thought possible. Whether or not the Many Worlds theory proves to be true, and certainly if it is, as BTO sang, you ain't seen nothing yet.